I desired a king

I desired a king,
communion was no longer enough.

I desired a king,
no, I didn’t want to seek your heart first.

I desired a king,
I despised your providence and your slowness to deliver.

I desired a king,
your faithfulness no longer wooed me.

I desired a king,
your promises to me seemed distant and unresolved.

I desired a king,
in my mind he would complete me.

I desired a king,
for at least then he would be kin to me, flesh of my own flesh,
bone of my bone.

In my desire for a king, I rejected the King.
Although set a part for His glory,
I wanted to be like the other nations.

Why is it that we don’t know what we have until its gone?
Why is it that we so easily forget the things we should store as
treasure in our hearts?

Have you not delivered me every time I cried out to you?
Have you not been my comfort both day and night?
Is it not known that you are the protector of your beloved?
Is it not my heart you passionately pursue?
Did you not feed me supernaturally when I was famished?
Did you not make a covenant with my forefathers and myself?
Did you not give me dominion over earth with the expressed ability to create wealth?
Did you not choose me to be your own before the foundations of heavens?

Then why did I ever think I needed a king?

Forgive me, my Beloved.
You are all I need, in your loving arms I am perfected.
I desire for your CHESED to be my dwelling place.
My folly almost cost me the Love of my life.
May my mind, body and soul always know, I am yours before I am any man’s wife.

Photo by Liana Mikah on Unsplash